Amanda McLeod says her four young children give her reason to get up every day and put a smile on her face. It could be a tough task to do, considering the rocky ride she has had over the last ten years.
At 16, Amanda and her partner Brendan found out she was 5 months pregnant with their daughter Emilee, who was born at 31 weeks. This year, while pregnant with their fourth child, Brendan was tragically killed on his motorbike just two streets outside the family home.
Amanda , now 27, said her strength stems back to her early introduction to motherhood.
“We were living in New South Wales at the time. I had finished year 10 and was working with Flight Centre, my partner Brendan was working at Holden, and we had career plans set,” she said.
“One day I was lying on the lounge and told my mum I felt palpitations in my stomach, but my Mum just laughed and joked that I had palpitations in my head and to go to sleep.”
On 1, September 2004, after getting sick at a work conference and again later that week, Amanda decided to go to the doctors and see if she could get something to help her with her gastro-like symptoms. When the doctor suggested she do a pregnancy test, Amanda agreed but was not concerned.
“I never expected I could be pregnant,” she said.
“I hadn’t gained any weight. I had actually lost ten kilos because I was a bigger girl and had gone on Weight Watchers. I was also on Implanon and I trusted it(a birth control which can cause you to have no or less periods and is 99 per cent effective).”
When the doctor told Amanda she was pregnant, she was shocked. Amanda phoned her mum in tears, who was just as stunned as Amanda. She was devastated to learn only two weeks earlier that her daughter was having sex.
“My mum called the doctor and demanded I get an emergency ultrasound. Meanwhile I walked to Brendan’s to tell him the news and we both decided we were too young and should focus on our careers,” she said.
But that afternoon, when they had the ultrasound, some more surprising news would quickly change their minds.
“We were told I was five months and three weeks pregnant and it was a girl. I was still stunned but Brendan had the biggest smile on his face. ” Amanda said.
“This all happened in one day. It was pretty overwhelming.”
The baby was due on Brendan’s birthday, 14 January.
When Amanda was 31 weeks, on November 18, she went to her first antenatal appointment. The doctor checked her blood pressure and told her not to move and left the room. Amada ignored his wishes and stood up to call her mum into the room.
The doctor returned and lectured her for moving. He said her blood pressure was 180 over 220, and she had severe pre-eclampsia and toxemia. If Amanda had taken one more step she would have died. She was scheduled for an emergency caesarean the next morning, and at 10:20am on 19 November, Amanda had Emilee, who weighed a mere 2 pound 12 and was the length of a hand. Emilee spent the next five days in intensive care, and then was in special care until she was released from hospital on 27 December.
“I had to grow up pretty quickly,” Amanda said.
“We went from finding out we were pregnant to having a baby so quickly. We got our own place and I stayed home with Emilee and Brendan continued to work.”
The couple stayed together and had two more girls, Calais and Rhianna. But Amanda’s world would come crashing down on 27 May this year. Amanda was almost six months pregnant and had just had her baby shower two days prior, when Brendan was struck and killed by a four wheel drive while on his motorbike.
“It happened only two streets away from our house, so it was too much for me and the girls to handle and we decided to move to Pakenham in July to be with my mum,” Amanda said.
Baby Brendan was born seven weeks ago and Amanda is now trying to raise enough funds to move back to New South Wales.
Amanda said baby Brendan was the spitting image of his dad, which was both heart-breaking and comforting at the same time. She credited her children for keeping her smiling.
“My kids give me a reason to get up and smile every day,” she said.
“I sometimes wish I would have waited a little longer to have children so I can give them more and be more financially stable- but I have four healthy children and wouldn’t change it for the world. (Brendan’s passing) is another hurdle we have to get though, but I am trying to keep a positive attitude towards life.”
