By Jade Glen
Sleep.
For parents of babies and toddlers, sleep is the all-consuming, all-encompassing Holy Grail.
When you are meant to be asleep, you are often awake; when you are awake, you are often thinking about sleep.
We all want to know how to get it, or how to improve it.
In this feature, we look at two ways you can help improve your baby’s sleep.
I am a two-time graduate of Kooweerup’s Early Parenting Unit, which gives parents a day workshop on routines and allows you to settle your baby to sleep in front of a midwife, who can offer helpful tips.
I remember the first time I attended, more than two years ago, I asked what I thought was a very pertinent question.
“If babies are so tired, why do they hate going to sleep so much?”
“If I knew the answer to that,’ the midwife said, ‘I would not be here right now. I would be sailing around the Whitsundays on my yacht.”
Let me sleep on it.
THE EARLY PARENTING UNIT
Exhausted parents and unsettled babies are offered a lifeline at Kooweerup Regional Health Service’s Early Parenting Unit.
Every weekday, families travel from far and wide to attend what is one of only a handful of day-stay programs in Victoria.
The midwives offer a tried-and-tested program which aims to remove the uncertainty and desperation that can plague sleep-deprived parents.
Following the cycle of ‘Feed, Play, Sleep’, parents are given age-appropriate routines and shown techniques to settle their baby.
KRHS Health Promotion manager Aileen Thoms said the Early Parenting Unit had been supporting parents for more than 12 years. The service is so popular that most parents can expect a wait of four to six weeks for a place.
“We support parents and help build skills and knowledge around feeding and sleep,” Ms Thoms said.
Parents can self-refer or are referred by their Maternal Child Health Nurse or GP.
“The mum or parent is then triaged over the phone and we try to group together those that have similar issues, so they have both peer support and professional support.
“It builds the parents’ confidence as well.
“We can screen (the parents) for postnatal depression and screen the baby for any physical problems – for example tongue ties, and refer them on.”
The EPU is a free service, and about five families attend each day session.
Renee Harvey, mum to 12-week-old Juno, said the program had helped with tips on getting in to a routine.
“I was feeding or just trying to resettle for ages and ages and just not getting results … it’s just the uncertainty of not knowing what to do.
“I could see a pattern happening, and I tried Save Our Sleep (A divisive baby routine by author Tizzie Hall) but it made it way worse.
“This is different. It’s still baby-led in a way, and not as prescriptive.
“This has been really relaxing and informative, and I’m feeling more confident about what to do,” she said.
Rebecca Wood and baby Charlie, three months, were referred after the eight-week MCHN check-up.
“It’s been really good, really informative. It all makes sense,” she said.
“It is all stuff I’ve heard before, but it’s nice to be reassured.”
For more information on Kooweerup’s Early Parenting Unit, see www.kooweeruphospital.net.au
THE MOTHERCRAFT NURSE
Pnita Holthouse, a mothercraft nurse based in Cockatoo, offers in-home consultations to families in Casey, Cardinia and the Yarra Ranges.
With more than two decades of experience working with children, babies and families, Ms Holthouse is passionate about supporting parents.
“It takes a village to bring up a child … . a lot of our ‘village’ or local community, has gone back to work.
“I think one of the major issues for young families is not seeing or experiencing other parents managing early parenting issues regularly. Pregnant parents would benefit from being able to see and practice baby and childcare in their extended families, and communities.”
“I believe setting up and continuing with an age appropriate routine for your child can bring some order and predictability in to young family’s lives, and maybe some sleep for all.”
Ms Holthouse assists families with children aged 0 to four years old, and has experience in working with children with a diverse range of needs and abilities.
She advises parents to follow their baby’s cues.
“One of the most likely reasons for unsettled babies is us as parents, missing their subtle cues. Cues are the way babies communicate their needs, indicating to us what they are ready for now. Of course, these can be easily missed because of parents’ tiredness, or distraction with toddler’s needs, or just daily commitments.
“When your new baby comes home, it’s time to put down the books, and look at the child in front of you. Learning the cues and recognising them is the beginning of parents’ empowerment.
Ms Holthouse understands that sleep is valuable for both parent and child.
“Children need between 16 hours of sleep, at one-week old, through to 11 hours at four years old. While they are sleeping, their physical body is resting and growing, and mentally they try to make sense of their surroundings and relationships.
“Parents need sleep at night to be reasonable and capable at paid work, or staying home to nurture and care for their young family. Hopefully, both jobs are recognised as of equal value and importance.”
For more on Pnita’s services, see www.hushhabye.weebly.com
