By Jade Glen
Acclaimed adolescent psychologist Dr Michael Carr-Gregg delivered some of his top tips for happy and respectful relationships to a soldout crowd at the Pakenham Library on Monday night. Speaking at the Together with Me @The Library Summit – an initiative of Casey Cardinia Libraries and Together We Can to support an end to family violence in the Cardinia Shire – Dr Carr-Gregg said that the journey from childhood to adulthood was often a difficult one. Despite the risk factors, parents could play a key role in building resilient, confident and respectful adults. Dr Carr-Gregg also stressed the importance of early intervention and seeking help before adolescents encountered additional complications of substance abuse, academic trouble or legal issues. One in seven Primary School students demonstrated symptoms of depression, he said. While there was no such thing as normal – Dr Carr-Gregg said normal was merely a ‘setting on a washing machine’ – parents had four key markers to judge how their child was tracking through their adolescence: a rich repertoire of friends, the ability to emancipate from their parents, understanding and enjoying school, and a ‘spark’. “The ability to obtain, maintain and retain friendships is the single greatest predictor of wellbeing,” he said. “It’s not the quantity of friends, but the quality.” “If they are 12 or 13-years-old and can’t stand being away from you – this is a problem. Can they go to the Milk Bar and buy milk? “Do they understand and enjoy school? This is down to the relationship with their teachers. I’m big on teachers, they should be paid more. If I was the Premier I would double their salary,
because they hold the future in their hands. “Do they have a spark – something that they feel passionate about, and gets them out of bed in the morning?” Dr Carr-Gregg joked that he hoped, for the parent’s sake, it wasn’t cricket or horses that ignited the spark in their child – but said it could be anything, from sport, books, art or drama, dancing, or even Pakenham Library itself. He shared a wealth of resources with the
crowd, recommending books, apps and websites to equip parents and educators with the best insights on everything from mindfulness to teenage break-ups. Dr Carr-Gregg’s presentation will be uploaded to the Casey Cardinia Libraries website. CCL Chief Executive Officer Chris Buckingham said the summit provided free and easy access to information about family violence prevention, while helping to open up dialogue and provide support to those affected.
“By working together we can all play a role in building safe and strong families and preventing family violence,“ he said. For more of Dr Carr-Gregg’s wisdom and a list of his top resources for families, don’t miss the next edition of Casey Cardinia Kids Magazine.
