By Melissa Dorries
Parenting twins or triplets (or more) is vastly different than raising a single child.
Just ask Pakenham mum Tara Keegel.
Tara and husband Daniel have an seven-year-old son, Declan, plus five-year-old twin boys Jett and Lucas.
Tara is also the vice president of the Casey and District Multiple Birth Association (CDMBA), a group which provides vital support to parents who welcome more than one child into the world at once.
“It’s very different raising a singleton compared to multiples,” Tara explained.
“There are lots of things with multiples like jealousy and sleep issues that you have to deal with.
“It’s good for parents to be able to speak to other parents in the same boat, parents who have been there and done that.
“It’s that struggle and knowing it’s OK to feel that you might not be doing it right.”
Tara has been on the CDMBA committee since Jett and Lucas were eight months old.
In that time, she has seen the struggles parents of multiples face including a lack of support, settling issues and extreme sibling rivalry.
“Sibling rivalry is massive, but twin rivalry and jealousy has its own level,” she said.
The risk of prematurity and health problems are also higher in multiple births, and parents can be at greater risk of developing postnatal depression.
Tara, whose twins were born at 29 weeks, also said the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) journey was quite challenging.
She said parents involved in the association loved the support and opportunity to make new friends.
“People with twins can often feel like they don’t have the time to get out and meet people.
“We have family-friendly events that allow parents to get out and meet others.
“The big thing families find is by having multiples around them their kids aren’t seen as ‘the twins’. They can be themselves.”
The association runs three weekly playgroups at Chisholm TAFE where early education students lend helping a hand so mums can enjoy a hot coffee.
There is also a Young Bubs Playgroup for parents of children who haven’t started walking yet.
The association hosts regular information sessions on topics such as sleep, settling and school preparation that are specifically tailored for multiple birth parents.
On top of that, the association has a private Facebook group where members can get support and distributes a monthly newsletter with parenting tips.
There are currently 129 families who are members of the CDMBA, which covers a huge area from Dandenong to Phillip Island to Gippsland.
Most families have twins, however there are 10 sets of triplets involved with the association.
The group, which is affiliated with the Australian Multiple Birth Association, has been supporting families for the past 31 years – and it just keeps growing.
“The growing population of multiples out this way is just unbelievable and it’s only going to get bigger,” Tara said.
Contrary to popular belief, this isn’t necessarily due to more people accessing fertility treatment.
“The biggest thing parents of multiples get asked all the time is ‘were they IVF’?” Tara said.
“There are actually a lot of twins who were conceived naturally and not through IVF.”
Another misconception, according to Tara, is that having twins equals twice the trouble.
“Yes having multiple births increases your workload, but a lot of people say it’s double the trouble,” she said.
“We always say instead of double the trouble, it’s double the love.”
If you are a parent of multiples and interested in joining the group, email membership@caseydistrict.amba.org.au or phone (03) 9513 4445.
There is a small membership fee, however members get most of that fee back in nappies thanks to the association’s affiliation with Huggies.
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